As the official warehouse dog at the Community Resource Center, I am sure you do not understand that I listen to every conversation you girls have. Most of the time, of course, it’s very complementary…especially to me. However, I must say, Mrs. Mayhew, that I did not take kindly to the fact that you tried to freeze my human to death by denying her the use of a space heater.
Oh, I know you remember this. You remember trying to deny Kim and Betsy the use of a $39 space heater. And I know they conspired against you and your Principle of Discomfort, that a $39 space heater in a 90,000-square-foot warehouse was not going to thaw out their frozen digits. But yesterday I saw you edge toward that space heater. I saw you, if only for a second, briefly reconsidering your intractable stance on providing a shred of comfort to those girls.
And that is why I had to step in. I had to step in to challenge your Principle of Discomfort by warming up. You see, I am perfectly sized to gain the maximum amount of comfort from a $39 space heater. It’s practically a sauna to me. Am I looking at you with a slight suggestion of superiority? Yes. Yes, I am. Because I am a tiny dog with a big attitude. And you are getting no where near my space heater.
Now go back to whatever you were doing. Give away a mattress or something. Pico