Asleep on the job

Betsy and Kim wonder why I never post any photos of them hard at work. They say I always snap photos of them doing silly stuff like imitating fighting ninjas with expandable fly swatters and wearing funny hats that make noises.

So I try to take a serious photo of them assembling shelves. And that is actually a side story. We got shelving delivered for HCA Community Day, but a couple of the particle board shelves were broken. So we called the company for replacement shelves and they sent two new complete shelf sets at absolutely no charge to us. Well, we thought, if were were not the completely transparent and scrupulously honest nonprofit agency that we are, we could just keep calling them for replacements and shelve the whole warehouse!

I am trying to provide photographic evidence of actual hard work performed by my staff. And this is what I get. “Take a picture of us, take a picture of us!” They were pretending to be asleep on the job. Except Betsy was so tickled she couldn’t keep her head down. On a serious note, these shelves replace ones lovingly built as an Eagle Scout project by a board member’s son. They were truly beautiful and only the wrath of the Cumberland River raging through the warehouse could have destroyed them.

And I should also disclose Kim and Betsy were actually doing hard work because putting the bottom panels in the shelves was really tricky and the executive director abandoned her post as ineffective help-mate to go get the camera.

Someday I’ll actually photographically document their hard work. Or not. This is more fun.

A little help from our friends

I promise you I am not on the HCA payroll. But I want to just say that these people will do anything for nonprofits. Within reason, of course. Case in point: HCA Community Day. Once a year, HCA sends virtually all of its employees to one non-profit or another to help out with anything the agency needs. They will stripe your parking lot. They will paint your offices. They would probably give you a pedicure if you asked, but that is not within reason.

Our HCA Community Day volunteers came out to the warehouse last week to install shelving and help us sort inventory that will end up in the Christmas Giveaway. Because of the flood and being out of our warehouse for more than a year, we have a lot of unsorted inventory. A LOT. So a few pairs of extra hands came in very handy indeed. Willie, Jeff, Kim and Evelyn arrived bright and early, festooned in their royal blue HCA Community Day t-shirts. HCA also knows how to brand. I should disclose that Willie is on our board of directors so we’re always pretty sure he’ll be on the crew. That man has always answered the call.

The shelves were assembled. Pallets and pallets of boxes were sorted. The Chicks got to know the HCA folks over a gourmet lunch of sub sandwiches.  And at the end of the day CRC was more organized. There are lots of companies with a social conscience. But I’m not sure I know of one that plays that role better than HCA. It’s at the core of their identity, just as their founder intended.

“Be happy in your community. Be active. There is so much good to do in this world and so many different ways to do it.”

- Dr. Thomas F. Frist, Sr.

The monkey dance-off

We are choreographing the first-ever Monkey Dance-Off here at the world headquarters of the Community Resource Center. It is not every business that has the opportunity to do this. But at CRC, we receive a fair number of stuffed animals that sing from a major retailer and we just felt as though they needed to showcase their talents. We could actually hear them warbling away through their cardboard box prisons.

So Kim is the stage manager, lighting director and the head of photography. Here she is setting up the very sophisticated lighting system on the monkey stage, which may look as though it is simply a cart but you would be wrong. And if you think the lights look suspiciously like a string of Christmas lights you would also be wrong.

Betsy is the set designer, head writer and editor. She has just informed me that this project is work-related because she needs to learn editing in her role as marketing manager. I’ll accept that. Creative interpretation of just fooling around. This soon-to-be-award winning video will be showcased on You Tube, thereby introducing the world to the Community Resource Center. Or at least introducing the Monkey Dance-Off.

Important business. We’re on top of it.

 

The Warrior Chick

I just needed to report today that Betsy rocked out the Warrior Dash this year. The Warrior Dash involves engaging various unpleasant obstacles such as barbed wire, contaminated mud and fire on a 3-mile course that participants pay $50 each to endure. I, of course, spent that Saturday on my deck drinking gin and tonics, which I didn’t pay even close to $50 to enjoy.

Betsy is most likely having a midlife crisis. First she does this Warrior Dash, which involves signing a consent form that acknowledges there is significant opportunity for injury or even terrorist activity. Then in a few weeks, she’s going to some field in Georgia for Alchemy, which is basically an alcohol-infused festival in which participants build their own city, hold activities such as parades, dress in wacky costumes and burn a giant stick figure at the end. She and her team have been planning this for months.

I’m going to have to keep an eye on that girl. She might try to set up a flash mob in the parking lot.

Messing up our stuff

The anatomy of a giveaway at CRC. Every month, nonprofit agencies from throughout Middle Tennessee come to our warehouse for the giveaway. Some of it involves every day items their clients can’t buy with food stamps – soap, shampoo, paper products, diapers….whatever we can get our hands on at a good price from our liquidation wholesaler. But it also involves fun stuff. Donations from major retailers that become a bingo prize, a volunteer gift, a present for someone who never gets one.

This is where Betsy just shines. A few days before the giveaway, she starts to arrange. I can unpack all the boxes from here to England, but I am not to arrange. I am merely to place the objects near Betsy so she can make a folding plastic table look like a display at Macy’s. And she does that. I hope Macy’s never finds out about her.

“Take a picture o f it,” she insists. And so I do. Because I know what’s coming next. “Take a picture of it before they mess it up.”

We love our partners. We truly do. But they mess up Betsy’s displays. Betsy is kind of like a food stylist, but with stuff. With food styling, nobody actually eats the display so it remains beautiful and pristine. But in the real live CRC world, the displays always have to get messed up or people wouldn’t actually get to take anything. This concept isn’t lost on Betsy. But it annoys her occasionally.

For two days, agencies come in waves to get stuff. Since the recession has gotten worse, they depend on us more and more. Everybody’s hurting. But coming to CRC is like a little free shopping trip to a very faux Macy’s. They get basic household necessities their clients need to maintain their dignity and hygiene. But they also get a fanciful rooster or turkey pins or Halloween costumes.

And at the end of two days, well, it’s a pretty ugly scene. Betsy’s displays have been wrecked. The 2,000 new shirts that we carefully folded and put in boxes according to size are fairly well gone. Our beautiful work is now decimated and our faux Macy’s looks like a yard sale at the end of the day. But that’s okay. That’s the way it should be. Because next month, we’ll get to do it all over again. That’s the charm of it. And, Betsy might say, the downside to what I have come to call obsessive display disorder. Because, once again, they will be messing up our stuff.

 

This is how we roll

Kirstin came to visit CRC the other day and we decided it was the perfect opportunity to snap a photo of Mom and Kirstin on the wheelchair ramp specifically built for her. Well, actually that’s not true. When we redid the building after the flood everything had to be ADA compliant. But we like to think we built the ramp just for Kirstin.

In the olden days, when Kirstin came over to CRC she had to come in through the back dock door and then it was a tight squeeze if she wanted to go into the regular offices. I am ashamed to admit that there was nothing about the building that complied with federal regulations. There was very little of it that was actually up to code at all.

So that’s why we made photographic history of Kirstin’s wheelchair ramp. Betsy wanted to paint it pink but I drew the line there.